Blog - Lauren Sparks

Back to School, Bad Movies and Martin Luther

August 15, 2019 by Lauren 6 Comments

It’s that time of year. I keep finding myself singing, “Gotta go back [guitar riff], back, back to school again.” from Grease 2. Please don’t close your browser over my bad taste in movies. Over-the-top musical numbers aside, I do have a point. Despite the miasma that is Texas in August (really, we are melting down here), it’s book hitting and bus riding time.

Watch the school zones, pack the lunch boxes and hold onto your graphing calculators.

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As we gather supplies and get our schedules in order I’ve been thinking a lot about my girls and all those they will encounter this school year. I’m particularly cognizant of my little one. At 5’9″ she’s not so little anymore. High school and friends and new challenges beckon; much louder than I will in these next several years. I know I haven’t always spoken kindly of my strong, stubborn girl. Since my oldest is developmentally delayed, I’m in virginal territory parenting a typical teen girl. And although some days it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do (at the start of summer I wasn’t sure we would both survive to this date), I now find I’m a little sad to think about being home without her in the middle of the day. Well, with two part-time jobs I’m not home a lot in the middle of the day, but it was nice to catch up with her or sneak in an episode of 90210 together when I was. I miss her already.

But it’s once again time for both my girls to shine their lights in bigger spaces. And as preparation, God drew me back to a passage I prayed often over my bonus son during his formative years. Philippians 1:9-11 NASB “⁹And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in real knowledge and all discernment, ¹⁰so that you may ^[d]approve the things that are excellent, in order to be sincere and blameless ^[e]until the day of Christ;¹¹having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.” It’s always a little scary to send them out, but I have a promise from God that what He started in my girls, He will complete. His purpose for them will be accomplished. Look back at the same scripture passage linked above. It’s all there.

As we turn our thoughts toward academics and extracurriculars, I pray that I will keep first things first. As important as classes and clubs and activities are, the most important growth and knowledge is spiritual in nature. What my kids believe about God and their place in His plan supercedes all else.

I’m praying and planning all the things. Praying for positive friend experiences, praying for opportunities to share the gospel, planning to be the biggest fan and cheerleader, and praying above all to extend love and grace to my girls in the same way God lavishes me. Praying for the Holy Spirit to remind me that God is patient with me so withholding patience from my girls is not an option. This is another year for maturation, not perfection. Martin Luther described this better than I ever could:

This life, therefore, is not righteousness but growth in righteousness, not health but healing, not being but becoming, not rest but exercise. We are not yet what we shall be, but we are growing toward it; the process is not yet finished but it is going on; this is not the end but it is the road. All does not yet gleam in glory but all is being purified.

Whether you are a student, have a student or love a student, I pray you THRIVE in Him.

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And look up these great writers I link up with every week:

InstaEncouragements, Literacy Musing Mondays, Hello…Monday,

Dream Team link up, The Good. The Random. The Fun.

BloggerClubUK, Tea and Word Tuesday, Purposeful Faith,

GraceFull Tuesday Link-Up, Different Dream,

Let’s Have Coffee, Welcome Wednesday, Recharge Wednesday,

Worth Beyond Rubies, #TellHisStory Link Up, Porch Stories,

Encouraging Word Wednesday, Tune In Thursday,

Stories of Hope, Moments of Hope, IHeart Verse Link Party,

A Blogging Good Time, Fresh Market Friday, Feature Friday Time,

Friendship Friday Blog Hop, Faith on Fire, Traffic Jam Weekend,

Faith ‘n Friends, Dancing with Jesus, Grace & Truth, Booknificent

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Help for the Porn Problem

August 8, 2019 by Lauren 22 Comments

There is no dignity when the human dimension is eliminated from the person. In short, the problem with pornography is not that it shows too much of a person, but that it shows far too little. from The Theology of the Body (there are many different written versions of this like this one).

This quote from Pope John Paul II kicks off a chapter on Pornography in A Practical Guide to Culture: Helping the Next Generation Navigate Today’s World by John Stonestreet and Brett Kunkle. I warned you here that I probably wasn’t done referencing this book yet. If you have teens or tweens and haven’t picked it up yet, you definitely should. In it, the authors quote Christian apologist Josh McDowell as saying, “The question is not ‘Will my kids see porn?’ but ‘How will they handle it when they do?'” Frightening but true based on these statistics from The Covenant Eyes website:

*90% of boys and 60% of girls said they were exposed to pornography before the age of 18

*64% of Christian men and 15% of Christian women admit to watching porn at least once a month.

*One out of every 8 online searches and one out of every 5 mobile searches is for porn.

*Pornography takes up 1/3 of the Internet’s bandwidth.

That last one knocked the wind out of me.

With everything available on the internet, a full third of it is porn!

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Pornography used to be something found in plastic covered magazines behind the counter or hidden with a curtain at the video store. But the internet has made it easy to find – even for those not looking for it. And once you’ve seen it, studies show that it can be highly addictive, even changing the structure of the brain in similar ways to those of people addicted to drugs and alcohol. Some of the ramifications of this type of addiction are distorted views of sexuality and risky behaviors, marital dissatisfaction and long lasting feelings of guilt and shame. In addition to the personal damage porn causes, partakers of pornography are contributing to the ongoing problem of sex trafficking and the exploitation of women and children – whether they realize it or not.

With all of this at stake, we are wise to turn our attention to the possibility that anyone of any age can stumble into pornography on any computer or smart phone in reach. There is help for the porn problem. That’s why I want to tell you about a couple of companies doing good work to help the conscientious protect themselves and their children from the dangers of the internet. Covenant Eyes, who provided the statistics listed above, provide screen accountability through monitoring, analysis and reporting for $15.99 per month on a family plan. Their services are secure, private and comprehensive. They offer customer support and a 30 day money back guarantee. Check out their website here to see what protection and peace of mind they can provide.

The second company helps parents like me to easily monitor the phone, tablet or computer activity of children. Before Bark, I checked up on my teen’s phone by occasionally intercepting it and scrolling through texts, pictures and social media apps. This was incredibly time consuming and inconvenient for everyone involved. And yet I knew it was my responsibility to keep her safe. Busy schedules and packed to-do lists often kept me from being timely and thorough. But Bark monitors her texts, emails, social media accounts, internet searches and videos watched. Bark claims to have the most coverage of any monitoring tool on the market. Their technology scans and sends me an email every day of concerning activity. And I decide what’s concerning to me. The software detects language and images of a sexual, perverse, bullying or depressive nature. I receive a snapshot of the infraction and then I decide how to address the issue. No more reading through long text conversations and pouring over instagram. My child has more privacy and I have more peace of mind. It’s only $9 a month for the whole family and you can try for 7 days before you buy. It is one of the best technology decisions I have made for our family.

Parenting in this age is hard, but there is help. Authors Stonestreet and Kunkle recommend opening our eyes to “the breadth and depth of the consequences of porn” by reading The Porn Phenomenon: The Impact of Pornography in the Digital Age, a study conducted by researchers from the Barna Group and Josh McDowell’s ministry. You can also visit the National Center on Sexual Exploitation’s website for more information. If you have questions about any of these resources, I would be happy to help in any way I can. Comment below or email me at lauren@laurensparks.net. And join me in praying for us, our children and our nation concerning the issues of pornography and internet safety.

Sharing is caring! If you liked this post, do me the huge honor of sharing it to your favorite social media accounts. And if you want to make sure you see each week’s post, subscribe!

And look up these great writers I link up with every week:

InstaEncouragements, Literacy Musing Mondays, Hello…Monday,

Dream Team link up, The Good. The Random. The Fun.

BloggerClubUK, Tea and Word Tuesday, Purposeful Faith,

GraceFull Tuesday Link-Up, Different Dream,

Let’s Have Coffee, Welcome Wednesday, Recharge Wednesday,

Worth Beyond Rubies, #TellHisStory Link Up, Porch Stories,

Encouraging Word Wednesday, Tune In Thursday,

Stories of Hope, Moments of Hope, IHeart Verse Link Party,

A Blogging Good Time, Fresh Market Friday, Feature Friday Time,

Friendship Friday Blog Hop, Faith on Fire, Traffic Jam Weekend,

Faith ‘n Friends, Dancing with Jesus, Grace & Truth, Booknificent

A Tale of Two Movies

August 1, 2019 by Lauren 30 Comments

Summertime is movie time, and I recently talked my husband into paying good money to go see The Hustle starring Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson. Don’t come at me Hatha-haters, I think she is alright. The main reason I wanted to see it, however, is that it was marketed as a remake of the 1988 cult classic Dirty Rotten Scoundrels with Steve Martin and Michael Caine. I love Steve Martin and I LOVED this movie, which Rotten Tomatoes certifies at 89% fresh. Now, I don’t always agree with the Rotten Tomatoes critics, so I was undeterred by it’s paltry 15% rotten rating of new flick.

I should have been deterred. Rebel Wilson, who I think can be charming, has built her career thus far on the cheap and easy laugh. My husband hates that type. But he loves me. Bless him. So he endured what was, mercifully, a short cinematic disappointment. The stars, frankly, lacked charisma and the whole thing fell short of the wit and appeal of the original. I know, I know. Remakes are never as good as the original. Except sometimes they are. I loved The Fugitive (ok a TV show remake, but still a remake), the new Aladdin (critics didn’t really agree with me), Ocean’s 11, The Parent Trap, Freaky Friday and Hairspray! Even my beloved Dirty Rotten Scoundrels is a remake of a 1964 movie called Bedtime Story.

As much as I love a good movie (let’s face it, even a mediocre one will do), I think I still prefer reading for both entertainment and enlightenment. I post here often about my latest literary conquests, as I devour novels and comedic tomes as well as biographies, memoirs, and other forms of non-fiction. Perhaps my favorite, though, are contemporary works written about the Christian faith. By studying the stories and research of others, my beliefs are often strengthened, encouraged and challenged. Some of my recent favorites are:

The Louder Song: Listening for Hope in the Midst of Lament by Aubrey Sampson

Winning the Heart of Your Child: 9 Keys to Building a Positive Lifelong Relationship with Your Kids by Mike Berry

Stolen Jesus: A Unconventional Search for the Real Savior by Jami Amerine

Your Future Self Will Thank You: Secrets to Self-Control from the Bible and Brain Science by Drew Dyck

It’s a Love Story: From Happily to Ever After by Lincee Ray

Prototype: What Happens When You Discover You’re More Like Jesus Than You Think? by Jonathan Martin

Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands: People in the Need Change Helping People in Need of Change by Paul David Tripp

A Practical Guide to Culture: Helping the Next Generation Navigate Today’s World by John Stonestreet and Brett Kunkel

All very different and, in my estimation, excellent works.

But…much like The Hustle, none of these compare to the original. The Bible. The OG.

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It makes no sense to spend more time reading ABOUT the Bible than I do reading the Bible itself. But I’m guilty. I mean, when have I ever claimed to make sense? But I want to do better. Often, another author can give me insight into a scripture passage that I’ve never seen before, or add a personal story that gives me deeper understanding. These are good things and one of many ways we can encourage each other in the faith, but the BEST way to get to know God is to go straight to Him and His words.

I’m not cutting back on my reading habit. I wouldn’t know how! But I want to make sure I’m discerning and seeking God’s voice above all others. I read recently (yes, in one of my books – the last one in my list) that, “Christian is the greatest of all possible nouns and the lamest of all possible adjectives. it’s meant to describe a person, not a thing.” A person can be a Christian. A book, song or movie cannot. And just because someone is a Christian doesn’t mean their art has merit for me. Many Christians have wildly differing views of theology. So what is a blue stocking to do?

Give weight to the source of a recommendation. Not everything labeled “Christian” is worth your time, money and intellectual energy. When someone I know and trust likes a book, I’m much more likely to pick it up than if I see a review in a magazine.
Hold what you are reading up against scripture. Does it jive with what you know to be true of God’s character and His commands? If you aren’t sure about something, research it. Pray about it. Ask a pastor, friend or mentor for their take.
Don’t just skim over scripture references. Look them up. Read commentary on them or reference the Blue Letter Bible (by app or online) for information on the meaning of words in the original language. Are the verses used in the appropriate context? Double check me too!
Use good books to compliment your study, but focus your study on the Bible. God’s holy word. That is the true meat. Our daily bread. Everything else is gravy.

Happy reading!!

Sharing is caring! If you liked this post, do me the huge honor of sharing it to your favorite social media accounts. And if you want to make sure you don’t miss anything, subscribe!

And look up these great writers I link up with every week:

InstaEncouragements, Literacy Musing Mondays, Hello…Monday,

Dream Team link up, The Good. The Random. The Fun.

BloggerClubUK, Tea and Word Tuesday, Purposeful Faith,

GraceFull Tuesday Link-Up, Different Dream,

Let’s Have Coffee, Welcome Wednesday, Recharge Wednesday,

Worth Beyond Rubies, #TellHisStory Link Up, Porch Stories,

Encouraging Word Wednesday, Tune In Thursday,

Stories of Hope, Moments of Hope, IHeart Verse Link Party,

A Blogging Good Time, Fresh Market Friday, Feature Friday Time,

Friendship Friday Blog Hop, Faith on Fire, Traffic Jam Weekend,

Faith ‘n Friends, Dancing with Jesus, Grace & Truth, Booknificent