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Spending a Weekend With My 1st and 2nd Loves And Grace & Truth Link-up

January 23, 2020 by Lauren 34 Comments

Photo by Dustin Scarpitti on Unsplash

My husband and I just celebrated our 21st year together.  Truly something to commemorate.  I’m not sure why I get to be married to him, and the rest of you ladies have to settle for someone else; but no one said life is fair.

 

We knew we needed to “get away”, but initially struggled with where to go.  It’s been a while since we’ve traveled someplace interesting because…life.  But after analyzing things like childcare, time and available funds, we opted for a practically free stay at my in-laws lake house.  I must admit that, at first, I was kind of bratty about it.  I have visited Canyon Lake many, many times in the last 21 years so the idea didn’t seem fun or special.  But for us, for now, it seemed most prudent.  Prudent.  Isn’t that a romantic word?

 

No matter.  The last couple of months handed us more on a platter than we thought we could handle.  Family crisis, the death of a dear friend, job loss for friends and family, job changes and stresses for us and major insurance issues.  We have cried enough tears to be dehydrated.  So in the end, it didn’t really matter where we went.  We just needed a break from our regular routine and an escape from the fruit of our loins.

 

That fruit didn’t make it easy.  Allie had a youth retreat weekend at church, but had to work out transportation and other issues.  And when she gets stressed, the rest of us feel it.  And Shelby.  Arranging care for a 19 year old who needs lots of help is not easy.  Especially now that our parents are getting older.  They are still perfectly capable and generously willing, but we often worry that it could be too much.

 

Chuck’s parents agreed to keep Shelby for two nights, and my parents stepped in to help with Allie’s logistics.  Shelby started the weekend with an ear infection, two straight days of seizure activity, and multiple blow out diapers.  If you think an infant’s blow out diaper is savage, you should see one from a 19 year old.  But everything settled down enough for us to vacate and manage to relax.

 

My husband and I spent the whole first day playing.  We shopped, ate pizza, and saw two movies in a row at a theater.  With snack.  Just because we could.  Then we drove out to the lake house and had a romantic evening with no child sleeping in our room.  Just what we needed.  But I think our non-plans for day two excited me even more.

 

Sunday we agreed to sit still and enjoy a lot of quiet.  As much as we needed to focus on each other, I desperately needed to spend time with my first love – Jesus.  I spend time with Him every day.  But just like I see my husband every day, our time together is often rushed, unfocused and crowded in with lots of other things.  I needed time to savor my Savior.  And I did.

 

I sat in a cozy recliner and looked at the lake through five foot windows while I prayed, read my bible and live streamed our church’s service.  I researched scripture and I took notes.  I took walks out in the world He created.  And most importantly, I didn’t rush a thing.

 

Maybe we’ve started a new tradition.  Maybe anniversary weekends will no longer be about what we can do, but what we can not do.  I’m really not sure of much past just this minute.  But I know this year I really needed to just linger with my first two loves.

 

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.[ Psalm 91:1 NIV

 

Now for an exciting announcement!  I have been invited to join the Grace & Truth team and will be hosting a blog link-up here every Friday!  For those of you who are readers only, I will continue to post the original content you have come to expect.  But there will also be an opportunity for writers to share their work here with you!

Now for this week’s link-up! Let’s bless and encourage one another in our walk with the Lord.

Grace & Truth : A Weekly Christian Link UpGrace & Truth exists to point people to Jesus! We hope this link-up will be a source of encouragement every week. If you’re a blogger, we hope you’ll use this space as a way to meet new friends within the Christian blogging community. If you’re a reader, we hope that you’ll encounter new bloggers that love Jesus as much as you do! Most of all, we hope you’ll meet Jesus here.

Join us each Friday for the Grace and Truth Link-Up!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

 

 

Maree Dee

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Lauren Sparks

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Heather Hart & Valerie Riese

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Grace&Truth-Rules2

1.)  Following your hosts via their blog and social media channels is not mandatory, but appreciated!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

2.) Leave 1-2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. Please do not link DIY, Crafts, Recipes, etc. We will delete these links. We also reserve the right to remove articles that don’t align with the theme or are deemed by the hostesses to be inappropriate.

3.) Visit 1-2 other links and leave a meaningful comment! We want to encourage community among us, so please don’t link and run!

4.) We sort all links randomly – feel free to link as early or as late as you’d like. The playing field is even!

Featured Post Requirements

5.) Grab a button or link back to encourage new linkers. It is not mandatory, but it is required to be featured.

6.) Each host will choose one link to emphasize and promote via their social media channels next week.


Grab a Badge and Link Back to this Post.

 

And now, let’s link up!

 

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

 

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To End a Generational Curse

January 16, 2020 by Lauren 18 Comments

Boy, this is tough.  I have a confession.  Whew.  Ok, here goes.  I have been insecure about the way I look since forever.  You aren’t surprised are you?  Most women share those feelings.  As author Jennifer Dukes Lee put it, “We tell ourselves that we’re not enough – or we let our bathroom scales tell us that we’re too much.”  If this was the mindset of only a few, the diet and beauty industries wouldn’t be generating between $50 and $60 billion dollars a year!  Each!

 

I could tell you stories about what I believe caused the genesis of my flimsy self-esteem, but I won’t go down that rabbit hole.  What’s important to me now is helping my daughter avoid the pitfalls of misplaced self worth.  So I jumped at the chance (actually sat in my favorite chair with a cup of tea) to read and review Confident Moms, Confident Daughters:  Helping Your Daughter Live Free from Insecurity and Love How She Looks by Maria Furlough.

 

In the first chapter, the author despells any notion that becoming confident is important simply for its own sake.  As believers in Christ, anything good in us comes from God and God alone.  Furlough tells us that “security is in us.  It always has been.  When we think insecure thoughts or act on our lack of self-confidence, we make the decision to hand our security away.”  And “confidence in who we are as God’s beautiful creations protects us from harming ourselves and others.”  I personally made many unhealthy decisions and gave myself over to risky behaviors and relationships in the quest to feel attractive.

 

The author’s premise is that in order to instill confidence in our daughters, we moms have to be secure in how we look.  And although I agree with this, Furlough’s methods are a little too hokey and simplistic for me.  She advises making lists of things we love about ourselves and having mirror pep talks telling ourselves that we are beautiful.  Although Psalm 139 is a great place to remind ourselves of our worth in our Heavenly Father’s eyes, saying some of those things into a mirror feels a little insincere to me.  And so does a fake it ’til you believe it strategy.

 

The book includes an interview with a pediatrician who advises us to eat “5-2-1-0”.  Five servings of fruit and vegetables per day, two hours max of screen time, one hour of active time and the zero stands for limiting things such as sugary drinks.  This is fabulous advice, but looks like zero teenagers I actually know.

 

Furlough states that we as moms are the confidence standards in our home.  I believe this is absolutely true up until the teenage years.   By that point (according to an expert source that I can’t for the life of me remember but promise I read) parents are in the fourth place of influence for their children.  We lag behind friends, the culture at large, and other authority figures such as teachers and youth ministers.  So while I agree that the stuff we continue to carry around, we pass down to our girls, there are also many other balls in play.

 

Even if we could end our own obsession with physical beauty, society’s obsession rages on.  And that voice is strong for my fourteen year old.  What this book gets so right, though, is that true beauty comes from within.  We wear ourselves out when we focus primarily on the physical, because there will always be someone prettier.  “No matter what we do, say, eat, crunch, or tuck we will never become beautiful enough to fix our confidence problem…Our only hope is healing from the inside out.”

 

We, unfortunately, have an enemy that whispers constantly in our ears that we aren’t good enough.  Our daughters hear it and we hear it.  We can only counteract the negative with God’s truth.  He never intended us all to have the same size noses or the same color complexions or the same size jeans (genes).  He poured His creativity all over us.

 

After reading this book and giving it plenty of thought, I think we moms of girls have three action items here.  First, to pray to the God of miracles for supernatural confidence.  Second, to use our words and actions to help our kids appreciative the unique and beautiful ways God made them.  And three, pray some more and ask God to cover over the many mistakes we will make with our words and actions.

 

The end of each chapter of this book lists “Confident Daughter Discussion Questions”.  My daughter and I have been working our way through them at the table after dinner each night.  We are having the best, most valuable discussions!  (See the second action point above.)  I would pay the cover price many times over for these exchanges with my girl.

 

Your turn.  Do you have any advice for nurturing more confidence in yourself or those under your influence?  Join the conversation by leaving a comment.

 

Revell Books generously provided me with a copy of this book for the purposes of review.  All thoughts and opinions, unless otherwise stated, are my own.  

 

Sharing is caring! If you liked this post, do me the huge honor of using the buttons below to share it to your favorite social media accounts. And if you want to get these essays emailed to you once a week, subscribe!

 

And look up these great writers I link up with every week:

InstaEncouragements, Literacy Musing Mondays, Hello…Monday,

The Good. The Random. The Fun.

BloggerClubUK, Tea and Word Tuesday, Purposeful Faith,

GraceFull Tuesday Link-Up, Hearth and Soul Link Party,

Let’s Have Coffee, Welcome Wednesday, Recharge Wednesday,

Worth Beyond Rubies, #TellHisStory Link Up, Porch Stories,

Encouraging Word Wednesday, Tune In Thursday,

Stories of Hope, Moments of Hope, IHeart Verse Link Party,

Legacy Link Up, Fresh Market Friday, Feature Friday Time,

Friendship Friday Blog Hop, Faith on Fire, Traffic Jam Weekend,

Faith ‘n Friends, Dancing with Jesus, Grace & Truth, Booknificent

Lastly, my posts may contain affiliate links and I earn from qualifying purchases. If you buy anything from one of these links, I will receive a few pennies to help offset the cost of this website at no additional charge to you. Thank you in advance for your help

 

 

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About Me

I love Jesus, my husband and caffeine. The order of these can change depending on how tired I am. When my two daughters, stepson, and 4 grandchildren get to be too much, I practice yoga. God graciously allows me to share our adventures, victories and flub-ups from my laptop. May He be glorified here.
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