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A Conversation on Race, Part I…and Grace and Truth Link Up

June 19, 2020 by Lauren 30 Comments

“In a racist society, it is not enough to be non-racist, we must be anti-racist.”  – Angela Davis

 

If I have learned anything the last few weeks it is the words in the quote above.  I have heard many voices giving many different opinions about what is going on in our country, and somewhere in there is the truth.  But here is what I know for sure.  We still have a long way to go in the arena of race relations in America.  In an effort to keep learning and growing, I have asked two black sisters in Christ who are also bloggers to join me in this discussion.

 

Yvonne Chase aka the Single Woman’s Cheerleader and Calvonia Radford of realtalk859.wordpress.com graciously agreed to dialogue with me and let me share our conversation with you.  I encourage you to visit their websites and read their insights on this matter and many others.  And I pray God uses this exchange to further His kingdom and encourage love, healing and fellowship.

 

Yvonne wrote a post called Silence Speaks Volumes that I referenced in my blog a couple of weeks ago.  In it, she mentioned that it took her several days to publish a post about the unrest all around us for fear of offending others.  I asked her why she was afraid.

 

Yvonne:  “…most of the readers of my blog are white Christian women.  My blog is not for the faint of heart.  Much of what I write about can be seen as offensive simply because I’m a Christian woman and we’re not supposed to have certain conversations in such a bold way.   The church is too silent on issues that matter.  Let’s face it, most people can’t handle the truth even when it’s tempered with grace.  In that post, I called out white women on their silence that I see all too often on social media when something happens to the black community.  I see it repeatedly and it’s bothersome.”

 

Calvonia wrote a blog post called, “Say Their Names”.  I asked her why it is important to say the names of those who have been victimized.

 

Calvonia:  “In a society where social media news feeds and 24/7 television stations throw sound bites and news clips to us at the speed of lightening, we tend to react before we absorb the information  Speaking their names out loud causes us to think of them as humans with unique personality traits, gifts and talents.  For me, hearing their names made me feel their mother’s pain.  It prevented me from making their rap sheet top priority.  Rather, I wanted to know them personally.  I craved to hear their stories.”

 

And now, my questions for both ladies:

 

What do you want white people to know?

 

Calvonia:  “I want white people to know we are just as similar as we are different.  Black and brown skinned people are not an anomaly.  I want them to know we are scared.  When we watch the news, we see deeper than whatever happened that day.  We see black and white film strips in the civil rights archives.  We grab our children and give them “the talk” once again.  Because we know the media is not misleading us about racism.  We have experienced it far too often.  It’s like a nightmare you never wake up from.”

 

How would you like your white brothers and sisters to respond to this cultural moment?

 

Yvonne:  “I would like them to care…When you care, you take authentic action.  You post on social media from a place of empathy, not pressure.  You write a blog post because what happened to George and black people in America breaks your heart.  I want them to respond the way they would if George was their son or family member or close friend.  I want them to say what’s happening to black people in America is wrong because they believe and know that deep in their hearts, not because the entire world is now saying it.  Black people didn’t just arrive on the scene.  Now all of a sudden because of a modern-day lynching, you care.  Why didn’t you care before?  Why did it take seeing a knee on the neck of a black man for you to care?  Answering that question will uncover what’s in their hearts.”

 

Calvonia:  “I want them to respond with compassion.  Check in on me.  Ask me how I’m doing and wait to hear the answer.  I would love for them to ask me questions instead of telling me all of this is not real.  Ask me about my experience.  And listen – actively listen – with no preconceived ideas.  I want them to listen with the intent to discover something new about me and to identify something within themselves.

 

 

Readers, I have more of this conversation to share with you, but I don’t want to rush it.  These women have given us a glimpse of their heart and their experience.  It’s too important to skim over.  I encourage you to go back and read the answers to these questions once again.  If you primarily see racism, the protests and all the discussions surrounding them as political, then I would challenge you to listen closer.  Listen to the pain, fear and frustration in these answers.  Better yet, as Calvonia suggested, ask someone of color that you know how they are feeling.  What they are experiencing.  Do it IRL (in real life).  And then come back next week to learn some more from my blogger friends in “A Conversation on Race, Part II”.

 

And now for this week’s featured post!

 

Barbara Harper Lee of Stray Thoughts:  A Home for the Stray Thoughts of an Ordinary Christian Woman, reviewed Dr. Michelle Bengtson‘s book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip:  How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises here.  Michelle is a fellow believing blogger (I love alliteration.) and a board certified clinical neuropsychologist.  In this time of Covid 19, high unemployment and racial tensions, not to mention normal daily stresses and fears, I needed to learn about this resource.  Visit both of these ladies online for voices of wisdom and biblical encouragement.

 

Now for this week’s link-up! Let’s bless and encourage one another in our walk with the Lord.

 

Grace & Truth : A Weekly Christian Link Up

Grace & Truth exists to point people to Jesus! We hope this link-up will be a source of encouragement every week. If you’re a blogger, we hope you’ll use this space as a way to meet new friends within the Christian blogging community. If you’re a reader, we hope that you’ll encounter new bloggers that love Jesus as much as you do! Most of all, we hope you’ll meet Jesus here.

Join us each Friday for the Grace and Truth Link-Up!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

 

 

Heather Hart & Valerie Riese

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Maree Dee

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Lauren Sparks

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Lisa Burgess

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
1.)  Following your hosts via their blog and social media channels is not mandatory, but appreciated!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

2.) Leave 1-2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. Please do not link DIY, Crafts, Recipes, etc. We will delete these links. We also reserve the right to remove articles that don’t align with the theme or are deemed by the hostesses to be inappropriate.

3.) Visit 1-2 other links and leave a meaningful comment! We want to encourage community among us, so please don’t link and run!

4.) We sort all links randomly – feel free to link as early or as late as you’d like. The playing field is even!

Featured Post Requirements

5.) Grab a button or link back to encourage new linkers. It is not mandatory, but it is required to be featured.

6.) Each host will choose one link to emphasize and promote via their social media channels next week.

Grab a Badge and Link Back to this Post

And now, let’s link up!

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

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Better Late Than Never – My Thoughts on Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd and Others…and Grace and Truth Link Up

June 5, 2020 by Lauren 40 Comments

I chose silence with regard to the shooting of Ahmaud Arbery.  Until now.  Because now there is Breonna Taylor.  And now there is George Floyd.  And now it seems we are on fire.  All of this breaks my heart, but I did not see that I could possibly add to what news outlets and those with bigger platforms had already said.  As a middle-aged, middle class white woman, does what I say about it even matter?  Do my thoughts have merit?  I still can’t really answer those questions.  But the more I think about Ahmaud and so many others, the deeper my desire to share a couple of things.

 

First, I offer a brief summary of Ahmaud’s tragedy as I understand it.  On February 23 of this year  Arbery, a 25 year old black man went for a neighborhood run.  A caucasian former police officer and his son chased him down in their vehicle with a shotgun and a handgun because they believed he resembled someone who appeared on surveillance video committing local burglaries.  A third white man followed in his own vehicle and recorded the ensuing confrontation with his cell phone.  What exactly was said and done when these men came face to face we may never know.   Parts of the video are unclear.  However, that Travis McMichael (the younger of the father/son duo) shot and killed an unarmed Arbery at point blank range, is crystal clear.

 

This event, and the fact that the police made no arrests until the video went viral (weeks later), created a storm of media attention.  Once again issues of systemic racism and justice took center stage.  In recent years, similar news stories, church shootings, police profiling, riots and protesting have been a catalyst for me to make some changes.  I took a look at the books I read and movies I watched – realizing that I tend to choose entertainment that looks like me.

 

I am most comfortable with white and middle class.  It’s not pretty, but it’s true.  For the last two or three years (like I said, better late than never), I have made mindful efforts to read authors of different races and nationalities and see movies that speak to viewpoints different from my own.  I forced myself to examine my privilege and any biases and prejudices with which I view the world.  I don’t pretend to be “woke” to the things I’ve been blind to, but I am determined to keep working on it.  In light of recent events, I see my meager efforts are only a drop in a way-too-big bucket.

 

I claim no expertise here.  I have a long way to go and I’m sure I miss the mark a lot.  But here’s what I know for sure.  I can’t pretend that something (like racial bias) doesn’t exist just because it makes me uncomfortable.  It is only my privilege that allowed me to deny it for as long as I did.   I can’t believe these things are inconsequential because I haven’t personally seen them.  It is only my privilege that has kept them from view.

 

This week I had an eye opening conversation with two co-workers.  I posted about it on Instagram and Facebook.  I learned things about my friends that I didn’t know.  I read this blog post by a black sister in Christ.  I listened to the cry of my sister’s heart.  She is white, but her children are not.  I checked out Black or White and The Best of Enemies – both movies about race relations – from the library to watch with my family.   These are all small things, but they are broadening my perspective and increasing my empathy.  Don’t hear me say I can understand.  I never will completely.  But I will keep looking for ways to see more clearly.

 

Here’s what I know.  All life has value.  Some news stories brought Ahmaud Arbery’s character into question.  I read that he had a marijuana habit, that he was a thief, that he couldn’t hold down a job and that he’d had run-in’s with the law.  To all of that I say, “who cares”.  I don’t know what, if any of it, is true.  But what if he was the very person who was burglarizing that neighborhood?  It would not justify anyone taking the law into their own hands.  It definitely doesn’t mean he deserved death.  Genesis 1:27 says God created mankind in His own image.  The Bible lists no exceptions to this.  Black lives matter.

 

Let’s pray.  For an end to senseless violence.  For a stop to injustice in all its forms.  For us to be able to see and celebrate our differences with appreciation and not discrimination.  Let’s pray for us to do better.  For us to be better.  Let’s pray for a better world for my nieces and my grandson.  God help us all.

 

And now for this week’s featured post!

 

Amy Jung of wastelandtograceland.com ministered to me this week with What Leads Me to Pursue the Things I’m Pursuing?  She captured the age old question, “How do I know God’s will for my life?” in a way that made so much sense to me.  It’s almost measurable if we ask instead, “Am I doing what matters most?”  Since we are flawed we will undoubtedly still make mistakes, but if we are walking with Him and praying for Him to show us what matters most in each individual situation, we can relax a little more about the big picture.  And Amy reminds us that there is grace upon grace for the times we get it wrong.  Be encouraged by reading the post here.

 

Now for this week’s link-up! Let’s bless and encourage one another in our walk with the Lord.Grace & Truth : A Weekly Christian Link Up

Grace & Truth exists to point people to Jesus! We hope this link-up will be a source of encouragement every week. If you’re a blogger, we hope you’ll use this space as a way to meet new friends within the Christian blogging community. If you’re a reader, we hope that you’ll encounter new bloggers that love Jesus as much as you do! Most of all, we hope you’ll meet Jesus here.

Join us each Friday for the Grace and Truth Link-Up!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

Heather Hart & Valerie Riese

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Maree Dee

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Lauren Sparks

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
 

Lisa Burgess

Blog | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest
1.)  Following your hosts via their blog and social media channels is not mandatory, but appreciated!

To receive a weekly reminder of when the link-up goes live subscribe to laurensparks.net in the right hand column of this page.

2.) Leave 1-2 of your most recent CHRISTIAN LIVING posts. Please do not link DIY, Crafts, Recipes, etc. We will delete these links. We also reserve the right to remove articles that don’t align with the theme or are deemed by the hostesses to be inappropriate.

3.) Visit 1-2 other links and leave a meaningful comment! We want to encourage community among us, so please don’t link and run!

4.) We sort all links randomly – feel free to link as early or as late as you’d like. The playing field is even!

Featured Post Requirements

5.) Grab a button or link back to encourage new linkers. It is not mandatory, but it is required to be featured.

6.) Each host will choose one link to emphasize and promote via their social media channels next week.

Grab a Badge and Link Back to this Post

And now, let’s link up!

 

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

Click here to enter

 

Sharing is caring! If you liked this post, do me the huge honor of using the buttons below to share it to your favorite social media accounts. And if you want to get these essays emailed to you once a week, subscribe!

To find some great places where I might be sharing this post, click here.

 

 

 

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About Me

I love Jesus, my husband and caffeine. The order of these can change depending on how tired I am. When my two daughters, stepson, and 4 grandchildren get to be too much, I practice yoga. God graciously allows me to share our adventures, victories and flub-ups from my laptop. May He be glorified here.
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