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13 Days in Ferguson

August 9, 2018 by Lauren 22 Comments

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As some of you know, I have been slowly awakening to the problem of systemic racism in our country and intentionally seeking out people and resources to continue to learn and empathize.  I wrote about that here.  When the opportunity to read a complimentary copy from Tyndale House publishers and review the new memoir 13 Days in Ferguson by Captain Ronald Johnson presented itself, I jumped at the chance.  Because he belonged to the community, the governor thrust Captain Johnson, an African-American Missouri State Trooper, into a leadership role when the shooting of a young, unarmed black man caused rioting in the streets.

 

His earliest musing of this seemingly impossible situation made the hairs on my arms stand up.  “I see both sides.  But there shouldn’t be sides.  Taking sides implies a winner and a loser.  There are no winners here.  Even if some police see it as a battle to be won, I see only a no-win situation. ”  For the five previous nights since Michael Brown’s death on August 14, 2014 police lined up wearing riot gear – shields, camouflage, gas masks, bullet-proof vests – with military-style weapons at the ready and dogs restrained on leashes.  Johnson, now in charge, decides on a different tactic.  He marches.  Not in a line of defense, but side by side with the protestors.  Without even the covering of his bullet-proof vest.  He walks and he talks and he listens.  He gives the angry and hurting people of Ferguson what they haven’t had up until then.  A voice.

 

During the anguishing days that he marched, he saw tiny victories and huge setbacks.  Protestors initially saw him as the enemy because he wore a badge.  Law enforcement, even those he had served alongside for years, questioned his loyalty to the badge due to his lack of force in dealing with the constituents.  The Captain lets the reader into his loneliness and inner turmoil, and eventually the anguish that swallowed him whole when he felt forced to call for tear gas and riot gear as the protestors once again turned to violence and other criminal activity.

 

In the retelling of those harrowing days, Johnson admits to mistakes and regrets, but ultimately enough improvement in the community’s safety to call the city back to business as usual by the end of the month of August.  And yet, everything has changed. After a relatively calm fall, the news in late November that the grand jury decided not to indict Darren Wilson, the police officer responsible for Brown’s death, again incites protests and riots.  This time it lasts only a couple of days.  Then in March of the following year, the Department of Justice concludes its 6 month investigation into the Ferguson Police Department, finding that it “was routinely violating the constitutional rights of its black residents”, using force “almost exclusively on blacks and regularly stopp[ing] people without probable cause.”  The police chief resigned one week later.  Baby steps.  Inches.  But change.

 

Through it all Captain Johnson leaned on his faith in God and the sanctuary of the bathroom to cry out in prayer.  And yet our country still bleeds.  Cities all across the nation continue to have racially driven incidents and compare themselves to Ferguson.  But as James Baldwin said,

“Not everything that is faced can be changed; but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”

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Does Everything REALLY Happen for a Reason?

July 27, 2018 by Lauren 30 Comments

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I saw a recommendation for this book and couldn’t resist.  It’s the story of a young wife, mom and college professor who stares down the barrel of a Stage IV cancer diagnosis.  Doesn’t it sound like something you would immediately be drawn to?  Although not a light and breezy summer beach read, I’m so thankful I found it.  The author records beautifully the wonderful moments, painful experiences and seeming injustices of life as she fights for hers.  Kate Bowler writes with honesty, wit and the bluntness I assume only one dying obtains as she questions doctors, God and well-intentioned friends and relatives.

While a student at Yale Divinity School, Bowler wrote her doctoral dissertation entitled Blessed:  A History of the American Prosperity Gospel.  THIS is what propels her current book from poignant memoir to fascinating study of human emotions and reasoning.  The infamous prosperity gospel promises health, wealth and happiness to those who pray enough, have faith enough and sin little.  Churches all over the country preach this message and Kate sat in many and interviewed preachers and parishioners of many others for her first book.  But just a few years after, she can’t reconcile these teachings to herself and her young family as they battle her incurable illness.  In her infirmary, she receives letters from all over the country written by people of varying theologies.  Some preaching that she is somehow spiritually lacking because she is suffering.  Others weathering storms of their own who’ve been further crushed under the weight of well-meaning folks insisting that gut-wrenchingly painful situations could simply disappear if he/she was somehow a better Christian.

 

Bowler’s title question begged me to respond, if for no other reason than the personal confirmation of my own faith.  Does everything really happen for a reason?  I can tell you that you won’t find that phrase in the Bible.  On the surface, I think this belief can make us feel better.  If you don’t spend too much time exploring it, this philosophy might help “make sense” of some seemingly senseless things.  But some things really are beyond all reason.  Cancer in children.  Sex-trafficking of innocents.  9/11.  There is no “reason” that makes sense of these unless that “reason” is simply that we live in a sinful and fallen world.  So there is no comfort in it if the reason isn’t good.

 

So where is our comfort when the pain defies logic?  Romans 8:28.  “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”  NASB  We may not always know why something happened, but the Bible tells us that God can, and will make good things happen from it.  Through the lens of pain and our limited human vision, it may take a while to see the good, but good WILL come.  It’s a promise.

 

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About Me

I love Jesus, my husband and caffeine. The order of these can change depending on how tired I am. When my two daughters, stepson, and 4 grandchildren get to be too much, I practice yoga. God graciously allows me to share our adventures, victories and flub-ups from my laptop. May He be glorified here.
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